It felt familiar and good to step back on Doris and know that we are heading back out into the almighty Pacific. I’ve missed her. I found that wherever I was on the island I was drawn towards her. Her colour was different close to the shore and although the green was beautiful, I longed for that deep blue once again.
Samoa was everything and more for me. It is the only destination on this voyage that I had never been to before and I felt that it would hold experiences that would be a really special part of our journey. My instinct was right.
The last week on this incredible island has been perfect. We had an emotional welcome, got the work/rest balance just right, had some pampering, managed to see a few sights, all had a day off and time alone, helped Lizanne get some form of closure, integrated Meg, did some leg 2 reflections, spoke to family, did our interviews with Sarah, ate fresh food, drank cocktails, were on local TV, touched based with all our incredible support team back in the UK, got Doris prepared, had fun, took some deep breaths and were thoroughly spoilt by the spectacular people of Samoa.
Sylvia and her team at Riverside B&B made us the greatest breakfast this morning with eggs, bacon, fresh fruit, cereal and toast. We then headed to the boat for last minute packing and photos. The Samoan Voyaging Society crew were at the boat in our signed Coxless Crew shirts and gave us some farewell flower garlands. Zita had hand picked flowers from her forest and came to give us a traditional blessing that she does before getting onto her longboat and each time she travels. Nicola, Sonja, Wendy, Ian, and some local media were amazingly all there to see us off. Sylvia got us all to stand in a circle before we stepped onto the boat and said the most beautiful and heartfelt prayer for our departure. It was all very magical.
How am I feeling? A little overwhelmed. This is the last time we step on Doris and the final leg of our odyssey. I hope that by the time we get to land again we will have all realised exactly what this journey means to us and the huge impact it has had not only on the charities and us as a team, but also others.
Right now all we are concentrating on is getting back into the moment and taking things shift by shift and mile by mile again. So far we’ve travelled 4.2 miles….only about 2500 to go!
The first shift on the oars with LP was weird. Rowing felt strange for us; almost as if we were doing it for the first time. The 2 hours flew by and with the sun shining, the island in the background, music playing on the Fusion radio and all the time in the world stretching ahead of us again…I was overcome with happiness.
I’m excited, motivated and intrigued to see what this part of the adventure will bring x
As the miles count down to Samoa, the intensity increases. There is no time for being complacent and no relaxing to be done until our feet are firmly on land. The most challenging part of this leg so far has begun for me. I seriously cannot believe that we have been out here for over 3 months. Spending 12 hours of every day sliding backwards and forwards and rocking side to side to the rhythm and the motion of the ocean, we face all the elements that Mother Nature wants to throw at us. All we can do is take it and deal with the consequences. There is nowhere to hide and no respite whatsoever. For the other 12 hours of every day we spend our time either lying or sitting in an area slightly less than that of an average sized single bed! It’s ridiculous when you really think about it. Next time you wake up from your wonderful mono-phasic 8 hour sleep (I’m not jealous!), have a look around you and imagine spending over 90 days on your bed, sleeping, eating, washing, existing with one other person always in that space with you! If you’re fortunate enough to be in double bed, then just visualise half of it.
The last 72 hours have been a battle. A mental and physical struggle like no other so far on this section of the journey. We are so tantalisingly close yet things couldn’t be further from ideal. We have a very tight COG (course over ground – direction you’re actually travelling in) window in order to hit Samoa and the wind and currents have been making holding the necessary course very difficult. The rowing has been so hard. We give everything we’ve got every time we get out on the oars. Every time we manage to swing Doris round and travel in the right direction, a wave will hit her and swing her back. It’s frustrating and demoralising with the very real possibility of us overshooting our destination. Every shift has been a fight. A fight with the wind, currents, waves, physical pains and mental chatter. All of us have varying skin ailments on many different parts of our bodies so everyone is a little broken physically.
I’ve got so many salt/pressure sores on my backside that sitting is painful. As soon as it’s possible to take the weight off this area it’s gladly welcomed. The best position for this seems to be lying down (not good when you have to sit for at least 14 hours every day). I also have this strange skin irritation under my arms that has begun rubbing against whatever clothing I have on and my life jacket. It’s really uncomfortable every stroke I take until I desensitise myself to the pain. My left hand is heavily callused and beginning to blister from all the strong one-armed rowing that we are having to do. This also takes some distraction in the first few minutes of a shift before I can force my mind to ignore it.
I’d like to share a particularly hard shift that happened between 1-3am. Ems and I headed out onto the oars and we already knew before the handover that we were going to be pushing hard to maintain a COG near what we needed. I began rowing and every time I pulled the oar there was a pain in my left hand. My left bum cheek was really uncomfortable and underarms were being rubbed raw with every stroke. I dug deep and kept on rowing. I knew that within about 10 minutes the aches and pains would subside and I could just keep going. After about 45 minutes, I felt as if time was standing still. I was exhausted. I’d been giving all my energy and I was feeling disheartened. My underarms were still sore with every stroke and I felt like I didn’t have any more to give against the howling 18 knot wind and huge crashing swell. “I can’t do this”, I heard myself think, “I just can’t”. I checked myself instantly and then heard a loud, authoritative voice (that was clearly my own) say,
“You CAN do this”!
I snapped myself into gear and powered through, giving my all. For that is all you can give.
20 minutes later Ems and I were treated to one of the most incredible things…a moonbow! I’ve never seen one before but it was amazing. It was this white arc of light in the sky and it made me smile in wonder. The Universe will always throw something special your way when you need it the most.
I came in from the shift and Ems and I shared our stories as we’d both been battling different demons. We know these last few days are going to be challenging and we don’t want them to override the rest of the journey. All things considered we’ve been really fortunate to only be suffering such skin irritation now and after this length at sea it is not surprising.
Luckily we are all united in our suffering and this just pulls us even closer as a team. Whatever we’re going through, we’re going through it together. We control the controllable, believe in ourselves and do everything else needed with great SPIRIT.
We continue to laugh, row the hardest we can and talk incessantly about our bums!!
To keep up morale and to remember the magic of what this leg has brought, I have been asking everyone to think of all their most memorable moments. So…as we power through the tough times, these, as well as the incredible support we are receiving from all of you, are what we remember. Thank you for motivating and inspiring us x
After spending 6 months out in the middle of the Almighty Pacific, I feel as if I’m slowly beginning to understand her a little better. She truly is magnificent, as I’ve said many times before, but it’s difficult to ask you to come and experience her without first preparing you for her ever changing personality. Within her vast boundaries, Oceania can be a healer, joker, protector, and teacher. This is why she provides us with the perfect environment to fight and overcome our adversities and to learn many a lesson from her variable landscape. She is a very close ally of the wind and the sky and working in unison, they have a strong effect on her mood and behaviour. Just like us, she has her moments of feeling either frustrated or reflective etc and when we are in sync, a deep connection is felt. She has the power to uplift and change our moods and has and will always be our constant companion throughout our odyssey. Without further ado, may I present… Oceania the playful – Varied sea state that changes quickly. She’ll taunt us with splashes, but they normally amount to nothing. There are sometimes 2 waves that come from different directions that we watch collide and it’s as if she is doing a high 5! She tends to rock the boat quite a lot in her playful state and will also wet whatever we have hanging on the grab rails to dry and find this very amusing. Her favourite game is hide and seek, where she hides a wave and then sneaks it up on us to give us a little fright but no soaking.
Oceania the irritated – Big swell rolling in from one or two directions with the wind ruffling the surface of the water. White peaks breaking in the distance and also close to the boat. Bubble trails streak down the waves and you can almost see her frown. The sky will almost certainly be grey and rain will hang threateningly on the horizon. She’ll throw us some big waves and play havoc with our heading, just to try and make us as irritable as she is. This normally means that there is some one-armed rowing going on. Oceania the confused – This is when Oceania does not really know what is going on with her. There are waves coming from all sides and angles and there doesn’t seem to be any rhyme or reason to the direction relative to the wind. The swell is usually average to large and we have to be extra careful with wave splashage as it can from from anywhere. Average wind speed is usually 12-15 knots and as we never really know what is happening from one moment to another, we can’t normally keep a good course. Anything can happen when she is feeling like this, so we all know to stay on our guard. Oceania the angry – This is usually large swell with waves of a minimum of 12-15ft and wind speeds of between 12-21 knots. There is so much movement in the water that this face could be mistaken with the confused one, however, the wave direction is slightly more constant. To ensure we understand her wrath, when in this sea state, it’s normally pretty difficult to hold a steady course. She’ll crash waves down on us even though her anger wasn’t caused by us, we’re good as any to take it out on. If she’s really not happy there will normally be dark clouds nearby with thunder and lightening. Night time is when she lashes out even more. Oceania the reflective – This is where we work together. It’s where Oceania makes some time for us and gives us space and opportunity to gaze in all directions and feel her loving kindness and presence. She will help inspire us by having a magical light shine and sparkle down on her waters from either the sun or moon and bathe us in golden, metallic, pink, purple or blue tinged light. She gives us the calmer waters to allow time for our reflections and is when we feel her healing power the most. On occasion she goes completely still and silent and this is where we know that she is sharing some of her magic with us.
Oceania the happy – It’s always really obvious when she is happy. The water feels great to row through and we are making good speed and course. Regardless of wind strength, Oceania will normally share something sacred from within her depths with us. Dolphins, whales, turtles are among the gifts she reveals when she is feeling the happiest. She shows off her beauty in the light of a special sunrise or sunset and as the light catches her waves, it’s like a twinkle in her eye. When Oceania smiles, we feel her energy and we find ourselves smiling too. Oceania the joker – mainly found in the Doldrums She lulls you into a false sense of security and makes you think that you have a steady speed and course that will last a few hours or days, then changes her mind. She’ll throw in a squall that will alter the wind and speed or suddenly give you a current that halts your progress completely! She can send a squall your way and then change the wind direction and send it back again. When she’s in this mood, Oceania can either entertain or annoy us. Whatever her mood, the almighty Pacific is always mesmerising. She has taught us so much already and we have a deep, love and respect for her that has become part of all of us x UPDATE: – Sad to say we’re back on the para-anchor. After an irritated, playful then angry sea today with winds of 21 knots and up to 30ft waves, we are struggling to keep a southerly course and have had to try and halt our progress until tomorrow when the wind should be settling at 18-15 knits for the next few days. Looks like we’re going to be fighting to keep the right course and make sure we don’t overshoot Samoa. If it was easy it would be boring – right? – We took the opportunity to try and dry some of our stuff that seems to be perpetually damp. Towels and sleeping sheets were among the worst affected, so we all gathered on deck for a mass dry by wind session. There was much laughter and flapping of materials. Ems was doing so well, with her towel finally not so wet that you could wring it, when a huge wave came over the bow (front) of the boat and soaked it again!! – The body is truly a wonderful thing. From about day 86 our bodies have been speaking to us. They are saying, “Enough is enough ladies, we can’t take it no more. We’re ready for some rest and recovery and we want to be dry, clean and salt free. Please get to land as quickly as possible and look after us!!” We are getting all manners of skin rashes, irritations, salt sores and pressure sores and there is no opportunity for them to heal properly as we’re constantly wet. Last leg on day 60 my body told me it was enough and luckily 8 days later we arrived in Hawaii. I’m hoping that the 8 day rule will apply now too, let’s see if we make it Samoa by then!!
Four significant events have happened in the last 24 hours.
1. We have now done a full food audit and have allocated equal numbers of all different types of freeze dried food to each of us. We have a good variety left apart from Oriental Chicken and Shepherds Pie as distressingly, they have been the first to go. The other options will last us for the next 10 days eating 2 meals a day. After that, never mind beef curry for breakfast, there will ONLY be beef curry left full stop!! This collection of 48 packets of curry will have to be eaten for the following 6 days, after which…there will be no more food.
As we had had an amazing previous 24 hours making great progress, spirits were high as we all busied ourselves working out how long we thought it would take us to Samoa, if we kept averaging the speed we were doing. 10 days was definitely a realistic prediction.
2. We decided to celebrate crossing the 400 nautical mile mark by rewarding ourselves with something a little different. We combined a 15 minute social and a belated Equator crossing celebration and used 4 songs (1 chosen by each of us) to play out on deck through the loud speakers. We then proceeded to…dance! This social idea was mine…as dancing has always been one of my passions and I thought it would be good to try something different. I had originally proposed an hour, but it was decided that after 3/6 months of no exercise except for rowing, that 15 minutes was probably going to be challenging enough. It was hysterical. 4 girls on a pink boat in the middle of the Pacific Ocean, shimmying our shoulders, shaking our hips and flailing our arms in the air in a way that we had not moved them in months. Safe to say that after the first song, let alone the fourth, we were all exhausted. It was worth it.
After our little dance, we all stood facing out to the almighty Pacific and ‘whooooo hoooooo’ed’ as loud as we could and then resumed our routine of eat, sleep, row, repeat. Just another day at the office.
3. As is the wonderful world of Murphy’s law (more about Doris’ law to come from Ems), late last night the wind and current changed. Once again our speed has dropped and it is difficult to hold a course. We’re never allowed to forget that everything constantly changes and that we’re going to be challenged every step of the way on this journey. We can’t help but feel a little frustrated but it serves us right as we clearly still have the lesson to learn:
‘Remember the impermanence of all things, don’t project into the future and stay focused on the moment’.
Beef curry for days on end may actually be a possibility…
Moral dipped slightly…then…
4. We had an unexpected encounter. Our first sign of human life in 82 days. A lovely 51ft sailing boat S/Y Windcutter glided into view a couple of miles away while LP and Ems were on the oars. We couldn’t see them on our chartplotter but decided to call them anyway to say hello.
I jumped on the radio.
‘Unidentified sailing vessel, unidentified sailing vessel, this is Doris, Doris, over’
S/Y Windcutter then proceeded to introduce herself. We chatted for a while and then told them to come and say hello…so they did. Craig and Carol have been travelling on their boat for the last 3 years exploring the islands. They have just come from Samoa where they said they had run into some bad weather (Yay!) and were now heading to Hawaii. They circled us a couple of times while we shouted at each other and everyone’s spirits lifted again momentarily regardless of the limited progress being made! Thank you Windcutter and thank you Oceania x
Some of you may remember a few months ago I wrote about the sad truth about the state of pollution in our oceans. In leg 1 we rowed through part of what we believed to be the ‘Great Pacific garbage patch’, where the frequency of debris floating past us was alarming. In leg 2 we have definitely seen a lot less pollution, but it has still been very evident.
Please know that everything mentioned below was completely unintentional and every effort was made for retrieval of each object! I feel as though I’m best placed to write this blog as, so far, I am the only person to not have had a ‘Doris tragedy’ befall me yet and you all already know my strong feelings regarding Ocean pollution.
A Doris tragedy = when something has been very accidentally and distressingly lost at sea.
Ems was the first person to have this happen. After days of some of the roughest seas we had had in leg 1, the wind suddenly died and we had our first day of flat calm. This, of all days, when there was limited boat movement, was the day that Ems let go of her tupperware whilst cleaning it in the sea after her lunch. We still have no idea exactly how it happened.
Then, after heading off from Santa Barbara, Ems was generously cleaning LP’s new flask for her after a cup of peppermint tea and…boom…lost to the ocean as well. Ems has since made a point of informing anyone whose tupperware and/or flask she is cleaning that they do so at their own risk!
LP had an opportunity to get her own back on Ems, when a week or so after the loss of her flask, she too was kindly cleaning Ems’ tupperware before…bam…gone.
This, unfortunately, was the start of LP’s ‘Doris Tragedy’ bad luck. To date, she has lost Ems’ flask, her purple top, her favourite pink bikini top (this was a particularly tragic day), one of our hatch shades (a silver car windscreen shade), a blue flannel and a pillow case!
The pillow case is a good story.
This was in leg 2, when just after a beautiful sunset, a large silvery fat fish jumped and landed on the deck of Doris. It was thrashing around in a state of panic and LP, being our knight in shining armour, nominated herself to pick it up and release it back into the ocean. She snatched the nearest thing she could find from the cabin (one of our pillowcases) and bravely lurched forward to help save it. The fish was still flapping around dramatically and LP began losing her nerve a little. Practicing some positive speak, she began shrieking (I say shrieking as it was an extraordinarily shrill pitch that I believe the dogs on any neighbouring island would have heard), “You’re just a fish, you’re just a fish, you’re just a fish!”
With the mantra firmly in place, LP grabbed the fish with both hands and flung it into the sea. Unfortunately, instead of only releasing the fish, she also let go of the pillowcase. A life saved, but alas another ‘Doris tragedy’.
The loss of the blue flannel may be the most pertinent as it was the most used item. It was a sad day when LP realised that her flannel, normally hanging with all the others on the grab lines, was nowhere to be seen. Ems was with her at the time and sensitive to the sadness LP clearly displayed, generously offered a section of her green flannel. LP now has a flannel albeit a tiny little green one!!
Izzy in leg 1, had a couple of perturbing losses.
The first was her pink sponge. Izz had been talking about washing with her new sponge for quite a while and the day had finally come. Excitedly she remained out on deck after her row shift and was preparing for the big wash. All was in place for the procedure; the bucket, the soap and the sponge, which was placed on the side ready to do its job. Izz reached for the pink sponge and when doing so accidentally knocked it overboard. It happened so quickly, it was all a blur, but there was no rescuing the little pink sponge. The dismay on Izz’s face was priceless as she watched the pink object drift further and further away from us.
You would think a lesson had been learnt…but alas no. Days later Izz was brushing her teeth out in the oars and was rinsing the toothbrush with her trusty Camelback water bottle. She was about to finish up when the bottle accidentally knocked against the gate of the oar and…plop…into the water it fell. Make no mistake, Izz made a valiant effort to try and retrieve her beloved bottle, but as the current whisked it away, she found herself on the wrong side of the oars and, alas, could just not manage to get to it before it was floating off into the distance.
Last, but never by any means least is the lovely Lizanne. Now we are still unsure if this story is one of ‘Doris mystery’ or ‘Doris tragedy’, but whichever it may be it has caused our LV great distress. We all have matching blue green long sleeved Ripcurl UV protected tops that we wear to row in and this seems to have completely disappeared. Most of us presume it has been given as gift to Neptune along with LP’s purple top and bikini, but LV just refuses to believe. We’re hoping she’ll come to the realisation soon enough and are all ready to support and help her deal with the loss x
UPDATE:
We had a HUGE Mahi Mahi jump up onto the boat last night and smack poor Ems on the leg. It then flew into a flapping panic releasing fish scales and a very strong fishy smell of fear while Ems and LV screamed like girls. Our night in shining armour came to the rescue again. This time LP grabbed MY sheepskin and proceeded to enter the same scenario as the silver fish. This time, however, she learnt from her previous mistake and managed to keep hold of the object that had aided her in saving the fish’s life. Not so good for me. The sheepskin reeked of fish, so rendered it unusable.
In other news…we have had a breeze today which has made rowing slightly more bearable. I broke my non hair washing record from leg 1 (40 days) and finally cleaned it after a staggering 52 days!! Who knows what will happen in leg 3!!?
Better, stronger, happier, smaller, faster, thinner, richer, more beautiful…our world is full of comparisons.
I understand their benefit. They give us a benchmark to help us improve on a personal and professional level. They inspire general drive and ambition and increase our motivation to strive to be better at what we do, for what we want to see and who we are.
Comparisons can also help put things into perspective. If you think you’re having a bad day at work then just think about miners and their working conditions or the fact that you are actually lucky enough to have a job. When you’re feeling sorry for yourself the next time you have the flu, be thankful that you’re not undergoing another chemotherapy treatment, or having to learn how to walk with a prosthetic leg. Those may be slightly extreme examples, but you know what I mean, it’s all relative.
I have always found it fascinating that we constantly compare and contrast everything we do without even realising it. On occasion I think there is good reason but to be honest, when I go somewhere completely different or have a truly unique experience, I love the fact that it’s all lived and seen with fresh eyes and complete wonder – no preconceived ideas or automatic comparisons to be made.
Why are our minds so conditioned to make continual comparisons? I feel as though it’s a bad habit to get into and I’ve really been making an effort over the last few years to control my automatic comparisons that happen in my mind. It’s not easy! It almost certainly has something to do with being completely in the moment and not straying into the past.
When we do something for the fist time, there is always a sense of excitement, intrigue and possibly a little fear of the unknown. Whether it’s a new travel experience, challenging yourself with a new sport or competition, learning a new skill, facing an unusual situation that you have never had to deal with before or starting a new job, doing something new holds infinite possibility and gives the opportunity to create a good framework for future experiences.
This row has been the perfect example. None of us had any idea what to expect from the journey when we set off from San Francisco 6 months ago. For Leg 1 there was nowhere else to be but right there, every moment, living the experience. Perfect. However, within the expedition, there were moments where the mind slipped naturally into comparison mode. The starry night sky is beautiful but there’s nothing quite like an African sky, or the water is so blue here but have you seen the water in Croatia, it’s the bluest so far etc.
What about the habit we have of looking at someone else and comparing yourself with them. Why do we do this? It will only end up making us feel inferior and unhappy…so why does the mind take us to that place of thinking? There will always be differences between us, as we are all unique individuals (thank goodness as the world would be a very boring place). The beauty about the Coxless Crew is that we have an undeniable strength within the diversity of our team. We all bring very different skills, personalities and attributes to the expedition and so comparing ourselves to each other, except maybe our tan lines, angry bums and smell of our hair (!!), is futile.
Yes, leg 2 of the journey has brought challenges, highs and lows, but I’m not going to compare them to leg 1. Each leg of this journey is its own adventure with different special moments and team dynamics. They will all be a story in their own right and we are going to make sure that when we experience something it is not compared to anything else.
These memories that we are creating right now on the almighty Pacific are incomparable and that’s what we need to remember. Whether comparisons are friends or foes, we all have the power to decide how we choose to see or experience something x
UPDATE: We’re still moving in the right direction! Woooohhoooo…
What’s given and received at the same time, costs nothing yet is priceless?
Can lift you up when you’re feeling down and give you strength and support. What can connect people in a special way and speak a language that can be felt not heard?
Hugs are one of my favourite things.
Ask anyone that knows me, and they will confirm that I am one of the worlds biggest huggers. I don’t really do the reserved British handshake and although I’m happy to partake in some European cheek kissing, I’ll generally go straight in for the hug.
This was one of the first things the girls found out about me. On our initial meeting, I grabbed each of them for a hug. In fact during the whole expedition they have witnessed me hugging everyone from business professionals and charity partners to strangers passing by Doris on an event we’ve done and Kylie Minogue!
You can tell so much about a person from their hug and I truly believe that hugs are one of the best ways to be there for someone without having to say a word. Not everyone is a hug lover as they feel as if they are having their personal space invaded, and there are obviously certain situations where a hug is not recommended, but generally speaking I like to think that everyone will come round to the amazingness of hugs at some point.
The last couple of weeks has brought some challenging, difficult and frustrating circumstances for all of us here on the boat, but the one wonderful positive to come from the disappointment has been hugging! There has been a lot of hugs being given and received on Doris and as well as all the healing powers they contain, they have also been a surprisingly more stable position to be in! It seems as though two people locked in an embrace on an unstable boat is a more solid and balanced way to stand or sit. As we lean against each other literally, symbolically we also know that we are here for each other without question when needed.
UPDATE:
Apart from me in my hugging element…
Ems and I had a wonderfully refreshing sunset shift in the literal sense.
We had wave after wave of rain shower pass over us. Relentless for the whole 2 hour shift but great at the same time. The ocean looked magical in between the rain with a smooth molten and silvery surface. Huge droplets danced across the water and their feel tickled our skin. I suggested that we could save some time by washing whilst rowing! Ems grabbed the soap and proceeded to lather up. A couple of minutes later the rain suddenly stopped, I heard muttering and when I turned around, Ems was sat there covered in thick soap suds in utter disbelief that the rain had stopped. I laughed so loud and without restraint, it was amazing.
There is one thing that I love as much as hugs….and that is laughter x
Challenges come in all shapes and sizes. What is a challenge and why do we create them for ourselves and each other?
‘A task or situation that tests someone’s abilities’ or ‘To do something that one thinks will be difficult or impossible’
I suppose for me, a challenge is something that gives you a sense of purpose. It allows you to push yourself a little further, step outside your comfort zone, develop a new skill or learn a little more about yourself and others.
Challenges make up a huge part of our lives, whether we realise it or not. They can be big or small and are where we have an opportunity to grow and improve mentally and/or physically.
What happens when we create a challenge for ourselves?
When you set a challenge, it is good to have a clear idea about what your hopes and fears are for successful completion of the task. This helps to keep you focused and to give you perspective.
Preparing mentally and physically for the challenge is vital in ensuring that you have exactly what you need to do in order to accomplish the task and not give into fears before you have even begun. Acknowledge your fears but don’t allow them to hinder your progress. They aid in helping you plan your challenge or be as prepared for it as you can be but many fears can also just be imaginings of our over active minds!
The main fear that most of us have is fear of failure or fear about what others will think. You’re never going to know if your task will be a success until you begin it. Believe in yourself, have faith in your challenge and you can also choose to not give much importance to any negative opinions that come your way. We write our own story.
Just remember that:
———- ” The cave we most fear to enter, holds the most treasure ” ———-
The hardest part of any challenge is taking the first step. The rest is easy!
Doing and completing the challenge is the most intense part of the journey, as you enter into the task or situation wholeheartedly. Be in the moment, fine tune existing skills and grow from new experiences, then whatever the outcome, you will have found success.
Last but not least is the celebrating and reflecting back on the challenge. This is a really important part of the process and surprisingly few people make time for it.
Before setting off from San Francisco (for LP, Ems, Izz and I), Hawaii (for Lizanne) and Samoa (for Meg), we all had to write down our hopes and fears for our Pacific challenge ahead. We needed to think about what they meant to us and then we had to share them with each other.
I am going to share my main ones with you:
Hopes
1. Happily, safely and successfully complete the full expedition
2. Indeed prove that the power of the mind and strength of human spirit is the most positive thing you can access and tap into to get through anything that life throws your way.
3. The success of the journey is used to further enrich my life and I can take the insights gained to empower others.
4. We achieve everything we set out to do as a united team
Fears
1. The stress I’m possibly putting my family under.
2. Capsizing whilst on the oars
3. Injury that means I cannot continue with the row and will therefore let my team down.
Some hopes and fears differed but some were the same such as successful completion of the row, capsizing, putting family under stress and remaining a strong, united team on completion of the challenge.
We all had to deal with people telling us we were crazy for attempting this challenge and I think for most people a little fear and incomprehension shrouded all their thoughts about the expedition. The fact that we are unsupported, rowing an unbelievably great distance, only sleeping for 2 hour shifts, living in such a confined space, 4 women in the same boat, no proper toilet or shower facilities, 6-9 months at sea, fighting the elements etc etc
This is an almighty challenge for all of us and, to be honest, I don’t think we realise quite what an undertaking it is yet. For now, however, we live this existence every day and we find small daily challenges within this gigantic one.
A sense of achievement comes from all matter of challenges and that’s also what creates those defining moments I spoke of a while ago. How else do we enrich our lives and that of others without being the best we can be? Where would we be without challenges?
Aunty Linda and her incredible swimming students (as mentioned by Ems in her last blog) have taken on their own Pacific and have already reached their virtual Cairns, and my brother has taken on his own metaphorical Pacific by project managing a complicated building renovation. He is yet to make it to Hawaii.
From running a marathon, hitting sales targets for the month to making it through the first round of chemotherapy or making that first public speech in front of a large group of people, we have always said that we all have our own Pacific to cross. What’s yours? x
Whenever we need help, hope, inspiration or strength, we naturally look up. I’m not sure if that upwards glance is to connect with the ‘presence’ or ‘universal energy’ we all believe in (in whatever form that comes) or by looking to the heavens above we feel the space to breathe and the opportunity to clear our minds. The one thing that connects us all no matter our destination or circumstance, is the sky and atmosphere surrounding it. I have never spent so much time studying the sky as I have out here in the almighty Pacific and I have developed a deeper adoration and amazement for what is so freely on offer to us all and that embodies the impermanence of everything. Daytime
I’ve always been a fan of the blue sky as it gives a good bright light and background colour to photos and makes any place seem happier and more alive. However, I do also believe that a cloudscape helps to add drama to a landscape and also aids in producing some of the most spectacular sunsets I’ve ever seen. One of our favourite pastimes out on the oars is cloud watching.
So much so in fact, that we decided that we were going to create a cloud appreciation society on our return and were completely dismayed to find that someone has beaten us to it!!
Shapes, sizes and textures constantly shift, merge and break. Huge towers climb upwards and wispy tufts streak across the sky. Cloud colours Include white and varying hues of grey and blues during the day and pinks, oranges and reds during sunrise and sunsets.
There are numerous types of cloud and although I am yet to educate myself on all of them (which would be an amazing thing to know)…here are a handful I can share:
– Cumulus – are the fluffy cotton wool type of clouds that drift happily across the sky on sunny days. Normally this type of cloud does not produce rain and so they are also known as fair- weather clouds. They can however form a tall tower which is then known as a Cumulus Congestus and can give short showers.
– Stratocumulus – is the most widespread of all cloud types. This is a low layer or patch of cloud and normally what you see when the sky is overcast. Stratocumulus comes in many varieties and can be thick whereby it blocks the sun or moon completely, has more than one layer, is quite wave like in appearance, or thin and therefore shows the outline of the sun or moon.
– Cirrus – are those beautiful clouds that form the tufted wispy streaks and are usually found high in the sky. These usually turn an iridescent pink during our sunsets out here.
– Stratus – is the continuous horizontal sheet of cloud that forms and more than often comes with rain. We’ve seen a lot of these in the doldrums.
Rather than point at clouds and shout “look, a stratocumulus opacus”, we do what everyone else does and find as many shapes, forms and stories as we can hidden in the clouds.
LP and I are definitely the main cloud namers. Between us we have seen elephants, dogs, cats, mice, angels, robots, rabbits and camels, to name a few. We had a cat and dog, one in front of each other, watching the sunset one evening and I have seen a couple dancing the tango, with the woman’s leg placed high on the man’s shoulder.
Leading on from the lack of testosterone theme of my last blog, we have on more than a few occasions also spotted certain male body parts shaped clouds!
Daytime treats in the sky include: – rainbows – birds (Boobies, Frigates, Terns, Petrels, Shearwaters)
– sun halos Nighttime The cycle of the moon creates variety for us at night out here in the middle of nothingness.
With a new moon and clear sky, the galaxy stretches above us shining infinite starlight down upon us. The more you stare, the more you see. As the moon waxes (gets bigger) or wanes (gets smaller) you get varied skies and light. With a full moon our oceanic world is lit up as if a giant torch is shining on and around Doris and everything from the waves and clouds to the dolphins and whales are more easily seen. Only the brightest of the constellations are visible and depending on the moon’s position we are either bathed in small moonlight sparkles or are rowing in a white gold shining pathway.
When we have agreeable sea state, night time rows are some of my favourite times to be out on the oars.
A simple highlight during a night shift is either seeing a boat (has only happened 3 times this leg) or an airplane. On spotting an airplane, someone usually cries “airplane, airplane!” while explaining the direction to look and then waiting for confirmation from the other rower. Once both have see the flying object there is always great excitement and a chorus of “yaaayyy!”
I think it’s just good knowing that there are indeed other life forms out here…as most of the time it feels like we are all alone.
Nighttime treats in the sky include:
– moon halos – shooting stars
– satellites
– strange unidentifiable lights
– airplanes
*Make time when you can every day to stop and contemplate the sky and then think of us. Also remember, that however thick or dark the clouds, there is always blue sky and sunshine or stars and moon above them. Stay strong. Keep positive. Be happy x
UPDATE:
As if the universe knew I was writing this blog, tonight LV and I were treated to the most magnificent night sky. An almost full moon was surrounded by a burnt orange thick halo, thin cloud and then around the halo was a rainbow (moonbow?!) Surrounding the moon was an impressive collection of small broken clouds creating a patchwork effect. I’ve never seen anything quite like it and it looked almost other worldly. It was magical.
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